By Karen Battles, American Family Radio Staff

January 2001 – The E-mail glared at me from the screen. It said I was hateful and judgmental. 

The thought that even one person would believe I hated him was disturbing. How could I be considered hateful? Those who know me seem to consider me a likable person. Even when I disagree with friends, we manage to remain friends. 

Now I'm considered hateful because I have said that sex--homosexual or heterosexual--outside marriage is a sin. 

While working on AFA's new video, It's Not Gay, my comfort zone was pushed to the limit. I was forced to face the tragic reality of the homosexual lifestyle--the disease, the broken relationships, the heartsick parents, the emotional costs. 

And when I thought about how our children are being barraged with the "gay is OK" message, I just couldn't keep silent. 

So I began writing about what I had seen and learned. When my articles were published at afa.net and in the AFA Journal, I began hearing from my critics in the homosexual community. While some E-mails were sincere and thoughtful, others were downright hostile. 

The process of answering each message has helped me clarify the issue in my own mind. I offer the following E-mail exchanges in hopes they will help others deal with common arguments from those promoting homosexuality as normal. 

Thanks go to Michael Johnston of Kerusso Ministries. (Michael's story is featured in It's Not Gay.) More than anyone else, Michael has challenged me to think biblically about this issue. 

All we want to do is love each other. How can you hate us for that? 
I don't hate you. To judge would be to condemn myself, for I too, have been guilty of sexual sin. I saw how my sin caused great harm to me and others. Did I care for the people I hurt? Yes, I did. Did we harm each other? No question! Thankfully, now I am free of that former life, but only through a growing relationship with Jesus Christ. 

Jesus accepts everybody. Why can't you? 
Jesus accepts us sinners right where we are--we don't have to clean up our lives first. However, Jesus never intends for us to stay in our sin, but to begin the process of becoming more and more like Himself. 

For example, He did not condemn the woman caught in adultery, but He did tell her, "Go now and leave your life of sin" (John 8:11). 

He knew it would not be easy for her to change her pattern of behavior, but also knew that if she relied on God, she could change her lifestyle. We are told in the Bible a number of times that all sex outside marriage is sin. 

We're also told in Romans 12: "Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--His good, pleasing and perfect will." 

How can we offer our bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing, if we have bound them in sexual sin? 

Am I still tempted? Every day. Sometimes it's a struggle to overcome my emotions and desires, but I try to rely on God to give me the strength to resist the temptation, so that it does not turn into full-blown sin. 

Homosexuality is an innate characteristic like being left-handed. 
Being left-handed does not cause you to sin. Sex--homosexual and heterosexual--outside the confines of a man and woman who are married to each other breaks God's law. It does great harm to ourselves and others. 

My friend Michael Johnston, himself a former homosexual, has observed that homosexuality is contrary to God's model for relationships because it is contrary to His character. Jesus said, "Haven't you read that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,' and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." That same model is pictured in the Gospel many times with Jesus as the Bridegroom and His church as the bride. Homosexuality is a spiritual abomination because it perverts this picture. Biblical marriage affirms it. 

I have asked God to deliver me from same-sex attraction, but I am still tempted. 
Homosexuality is not a special problem in need of a special solution, according to Michael, and I agree. 1 Corinthians 10:13 says: "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man." All sexual immorality is rooted in the sinful condition of the human heart. The real solution is not to fix the flesh but to walk in the Spirit, that is, to become more and more like Christ. 

I don't believe the Bible is true, so what you are saying means nothing to me. 
I understand that, but I'm just trying to explain my position and offer you a thoughtful perspective on the issue with which you might not be familiar. 

At the same time there is evidence outside the Scripture that homosexual relationships are not normal or natural. 

Biologically speaking, it still takes a contribution from both a man and a woman to create a child. 

Also, you can't discount the increased rate of disease and other damage done to the body through the practice of male homosexuality. The body was not designed for it. 

Hey, get over it! 
When I think about children who are being encouraged to accept this tragic lifestyle as "normal," I can't just get over it. 

When a school-sponsored workshop taught by homosexual activists teaches children as young as 14 how to perform homosexual acts (It happened in Massachusetts.), I must speak up--not out of hate, but out of concern for those kids and the devastated life for which they may be headed. 

It's like this. You walk by a deep pit and see someone chained to the bottom of the pit. You call to them and say you will get help, but they tell you they are perfectly happy right where they are. It starts to rain and you know the pit will fill with water and drown the person. Which is more loving? To throw them a rope and a key and let them decide if they will use it, or walk away and let them drown in their happiness? The rope is the word of God and the key is a personal relationship with Jesus. 

Among many things, the Bible says, "Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 

Although I may not do it perfectly, I aspire to that kind of love, even if it brings opposition from the very ones I am seeking to protect--including you.