Ed Vitagliano
AFA Journal news editor
October 2014 – Little five-year-old Cooper Jasper died July 17, 2009, in a freak go-cart accident. The words sound so simple and matter-of-fact, but they represent a horrifying hammer-blow that, had it not been for God’s grace, might have destroyed the lives of the Jasper family that Cooper left behind.
He was young and little, but he filled whatever environment he was in – home, church, school – with giant-sized amounts of energy and laughter. One of his favorite super heroes – and he had lots of them – was the Human Torch, a team member of the Fantastic Four that could burst into flames but not be consumed by the fire. Because the Torch used the words “flame on” to ignite his super power, the expression became a favorite of Cooper’s.
They were also the last words that J.J. Jasper, Cooper’s father and the much-beloved AFR morning show co-host, heard his son say on this earth. Cooper told his dad, who was driving the go-cart, to “flame on!” He meant by the words, “Go faster!”
On a flat surface in the pasture, with little Cooper securely fastened in with a seat belt, J.J. put the pedal down a little bit more and did a “donut” – like they had done countless times before.
Something went terribly wrong. The go-cart flipped, and even with the vehicle protected by multiple roll bars, Cooper was fatally injured. He died in his father’s arms after EMT workers tried to save him.
‘Ambushed by grief’
The subsequent depth of pain experienced by the Jaspers was crushing and cruel. J.J. and his wife Melanie told AFA Journal that in the weeks following Cooper’s death, they would awaken in the morning and sob uncontrollably. Then they would get themselves out of bed and try to live their lives. When they collapsed into bed at night, they would begin sobbing again until, exhausted, they finally fell asleep. The next day it would begin all over again.
After the loss of a loved one – even a child – many people assume the truth of the age-old adage that “time heals all things.” But a friend told the Jaspers at the graveside service that the statement was not true.
“This is not a wound that’s going to heal,” the friend said. “This is an amputation. Just like someone who’s lost an arm or a leg or a hand – they have to find a new normal. You’re going to have to find a new way to do life without Cooper.”
Out of this tragedy, the Jaspers have felt the grace of God upholding them through almost unimaginable suffering and sorrow, but it has been a terrible battle. How does someone even begin to know what to ask God for in the midst of such pain?
“Our prayer was always to grieve well,” J.J. said. “We asked God to help us grieve in ways that would bring glory to His name – even though we didn’t know what that looked like.”
“God is always there,” said Melanie. “He’ll never leave your side.” It’s a message the Jaspers feel Cooper would approve. 
The Jasper family’s journey through grief is documented in J.J.’s new book, Losing Cooper: Finding Hope to Grieve Well. Among practical pointers he suggests are stick to the basics, and remember that God loves you; allow friends to see your grief; and rely on God’s strength. Many more faith-building principles will lead to encouragement, hope and healing for readers. Available at afastore.net or call 877-927-4917.
